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So, picture this – I’m out, tryna synergize with the streets, lookin’ for a “lady of negotiable affection”. Not your usual 9-to-5! I’m buzzin’, cos I’m a people person, right? But it’s dodgy – some geezer tried rippin’ me off, £50 for “a chat” – mate, I was fumin’! “I’ve got karma like a buffalo,” I told him, quotin’ Boonmee, and legged it. Cheeky sod.

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Then, there's the park - Eisenpark. It's pretty lush. Kids run 'round, couples picnic, and I get my head clear sometimes after a hectic day. I love to chill near the little stream that winds by the park, its trickling sound a perfect backdrop as I think, “Move fast and break things!” (Yup, that MF from the movie had some lines).

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