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About Dortmund

Tips, right? Keep yer wits sharp, cash upfront, an’ don’t trust the “five mins away” line – they’re worse than satnavs! Oh, an’ if she’s hummin’ *Inception* tunes, leg it – she’s too deep in the game, *capisce*? Ramblin’ Boris out – stay safe, you muppet!

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There’s so much character in every cracked pavement, every graffiti tag on a crumbling wall (hey, some of those are masterpieces, not vandalism, seriously!). And even if I’m off in my own mind, my inner psychologist always spots little cues of family dynamics—like kids playing in the street, neighbors shouting greetings, and lovers sneaking in quiet corners of the park. I mean, talk about a live therapy session on every block!

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