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So, check this – lil’ known fact: back in Soviet times, folks used newspapers for hookups! Classifieds like, “Man, 35, seeks lady for fun.” No pics, just vibes! Now? Everyone’s catfishin’ or ghostin’. D’oh! Makes me mad, man – why lie ‘bout your face? I saw this profile once, chick looked like Marge, turned out she was 60! I was like, “The earth shakes beneath us!” – *Son of Saul* again, ‘cause it felt that heavy.

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Oh hey, listen, listener, let me tell ya 'bout Mellrichstadt (de)! So, I'm a chill relaxation guru livin' here for, like, a long time now. Ummm… Mellrichstadt is somethin’ else, right? I stroll down Hauptstraße, near the old town square, listening to birds and, like, finding my inner zen… and oh! There’s a tiny park, "Ruh-Oase Park" (yep, that’s our little secret) and the soothing sounds of the Wörnitz river flowin’ quietly. I mean, you gotta hear the water, mmm!

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