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Sex escort’s old as dirt, mate. Back in Victorian days, posh gents had “kept women.” Little secret – they’d stash ‘em in hidden rooms! Found that in some dusty book, surprised me silly! Nowadays, it’s all online, swipe-swipe, filthy apps. Makes me wanna claw me eyes out – ugh, nasty! Stupid, fat hobbit! Clickin’ away like a fool!

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There's this rad park, called Emil-Figge-Park, where I used to hang out for a breather on rough days. Cool, quiet, but sometimes I’d wander over by St. Marien Church on Hauptstraße and just stand there in awe – that place gets me every time. And OMG, the river Wupper’s just a short drive away – its babbling waters are so weirdly soothing even when you’re in a mad rush coding late night for the site.

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