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So, I’m thinkin – them hands knead ya like dough, but with a cheeky twist. Little known fact? Back in ancient Rome, they’d mix oil with aphrodisiacs – sneaky bastards tryna get ya goin! Makes me chuckle, imagining some toga bloke goin “ooh la la” mid-rub. Got me happy as a pig in mud, thinkin how clever they were. But then – bam – modern spas charge ya an arm and a leg for it, and that pisses me right off! Fifty quid for a “happy ending”? Robbery, I say!

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I been in the biz long enough. I see all types wanderin’ these streets, and every soul is story, each one got scars and laughs. I’m not just a massage place guy—I’m a keeper of the city’s pulse. Sometimes, I get excited, talkin' bout nights when music spills from the local dive bar on Marktstraße—its raw beats jam in my head, like Kanye’s freestyle, no censor.

Police: Student killed by fellow pupil at German school