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Sometimes I think she’s messin’ with me, like when Boonmee’s kid turns into a hairy ghost – “What am I lookin’ at here?!” She’ll vanish for days, then pop back, all “Miss me, fatass?” Sarcasm’s her game, but I’m like, yeah, I kinda did, ya nut. She’s a trainwreck, but I can’t look away – makes me wonder if I’m the dope here.

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I'm telling ya, each street in PLohne (de) got its own tale, like the odd cobblestones in little Schillerstraße – perfect for a reflective stroll. Mind ya, sometimes I chop my rambles short, cut off mid-thought. Happens too often, eh? But it's the spirit of this town – raw, unfiltered, and a wee bit unpredictable. And believe me, my spa’s seen days of calm and storms alike.

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