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Aight, precious, listen up! Me, Gollum, loves me a good tale, and this one’s bout them sex escorts. We hates it! Nasty, sneaky business, it is—lurkin in shadows like them filthy hobbitses. Watched "Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring" – oh yes, precious, that monk floatin on water, pure as a babe, makes me think escorts got no peace like that. “What is this lust?” – movie says that, and I’m screamin, “We knows it, we hates it!”

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So, dear friend, come hither to PLohmar and let thine soul fly free! Forsooth, thou wilt see not just bricks and mortar, but a living, breathing tapestry of life's fickle wonder—“We don't rush, we wander,” just like in that movie I adore so much. Fare thee well until we meet on those enchanted streets, where every moment is a cherished soliloquy of love and life.

William Lohmar, a judge who wanted to be a champion for the little guy, dies