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About Essen

Alright, so I’m a carpenter, right? Dr. House style—sarcastic, gimpy bastard, “Everybody lies.” Let’s talk about whores, ‘cause why not? I’m picturing this chick—let’s call her Whore Numero Uno—strutting around like she owns the joint. Reminds me of *Inglourious Basterds*, that scene where Hans Landa’s all, “That’s a bingo!”—she’s got that smug vibe. Total pro, works the room, knows every guy’s a sucker. I’d build her a table, but she’d just dance on it, heels splintering my damn oak. Pisses me off—good wood ain’t cheap!

Kaufen, was das Herz begehrt

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Man, I’m a dating site developer, so I see the hidden hearts in alleys and corners that others miss, ya know? I cruise by Wilhelmsstraße – where the old brickwork just screams history and weird cozy vibes. And OMG, Hauptstraße is a rollercoaster – busy, busy, and full of surprising nooks. One time, I met this quirky artist at the corner of Lindenweg and Melancholie Lane (yeah, I made that up, but it feels right!) – it blew my mind!

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