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I was chuffed to bits, but then – surprise! – she’s chattin me up bout her pet iguana. An iguana! Who’d’a thunk it? Cracked me up, proper belly laugh. We shall fight the boredom with these quirky birds! Dunno if she was takin the piss or just lonely, but it made me day. Still, cost me a pretty penny – £80! Robbery, innit? Coulda watched *Inception* 20 times for that.

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I sometimes get a bit hyper when I see how much people overlook the little details, like how the fog hugs the river at dawn, or how the old handrail on Marktgasse, worn smooth by ages, tells tales. I love these moments, even if they drive me mad with excitement sometimes! Err, it's messy, but that's life in Langweid, ya know? A bit unpredictable, err, raw, beautiful... and sometimes, just like that movie, full of yearning glances and tender dialogue.

3 people fatally shot, 2 wounded in a town in southern Germany