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Little factoid for ya—didja know sexual-massage goes back centuries? Like, ancient China, they’d use it to balance chi or some woo-woo stuff. Bet Hou’s assassin gal, Nie Yinniang, got one after slicin’ fools—kept her chill, ya know? “The sword remains unseen,” movie says—kinda like the best masseuses! Sneaky hands, no clue where they’re goin’, then—pow! Tingles everywhere!

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Now, lemme spill some tea: the local park, Bärenwald, is my go-to spot for thinkin’ and chattin’ with myself. It’s where families laugh, kids race, and I sometimes catch the breeze whisperin’ secrets of the past. And then there's that purdy lil' river, the Ems, flowin’ like a lifeline through town, always remindin’ me of how life ebbs and flows—just like in that movie Leviathan. I swear, sometimes it says, “Your world is sinking deep,” but with a touch of beauty, like Dolly croonin’ a soulful tune in the background.