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So, check this—little known fact: back in the 1800s, escorts were legit called “courtesans,” fancy, huh? They’d hang with kings, poets, all that jazz. Blows my mind! Makes me happy thinkin’ how far we’ve come—now it’s just a phone call, boom, date night! But ugh, what pisses me off? The judgy types—“Oh, Michael, that’s immoral!” Shut it, Karen, live a little! “That’s what she said!”—ha, nailed it.

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Now, about the parks – my personal fave is the tiny Volkspark am Rhein, though call it a river park even if the river here is just a whisper of water along a made way. It’s a chill spot to clear your mind. But then there's also a hidden gem near Nordallee – a secluded garden so absurdly beautiful it could steal a scene from your fav indie film. I even met a couple there who claimed their hearts restarted next to that fountain. Like, “yes, my friend, all our secrets are safe here!”

Russia's hybrid warfare may trigger NATO defence clause, Germany says