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About Essen

So, like, sex-dating’s these apps, yeah? Tinder, Bumble, whatever—swipe, swipe, bang! Met this chick once, total babe, but—ruh-roh!—she ghosted me after one coffee. Pissed me off, man! Wasted my best Scooby snacks on her! Then there’s the dudes—half posin’ shirtless, flexin’ like they’re hot shit. Bro, chill, it’s a hookup, not a gym ad.

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Oh, and lemme tell ya, I once got so mad at the petty bickering outside the municipal library on Friedrichstrasse, it reminded me of a wild scene from The Return – where every silence spoke louder than words. My inner Gru screamed, “Lightbulb, you idiots!” Hah, not that I’d say that out loud, but you get me.