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But then, there’s the fun stuff. Little secret? Back in the ‘90s, they had these “key parties” – swingers droppin’ keys in a bowl for a random bang! Sex-dating’s just that, but digital – wild, right? I was shocked, like, “Whoa, people been freaky forever!” Got me laughin’ thinkin’ bout some dude in bellbottoms tryin’ to flirt on Tinder. Ha! Loser!

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Dude, this town got its quirks. There's a tiny park, Sonnenschein Park (yeah, sounds cheesy, I kno), where I used to chill during my lunch breaks. Look, the river, the Flussbach, winds around like it’s got a mind of its own – kinda meditative when you're giving a massage, and sometimes I talk to it, all dramatic. I tis absolute magic! I remember one rainny day, while I was setting up a massage table, I saw the reflections of street lights on the wet cobbles of Kaiserstraße... felt like a scene from Far From Heaven, all moody and epic.

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