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About Dusseldorf

Wotcha, mate, gather round, listen up! Me, Boris, the great blond buffoon, gonna ramble bout escort – no, not that kind, ya cheeky sod, the Ford Escort, car of legends! Vroom vroom, eh? Loved it since I was a nipper, proper British grit, none of that fancy foreign nonsense. Reminds me of *Inception* – “You musn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling!” – cos the Escort, it’s a dream, innit, simple yet bonkers clever.

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So, where do I start? I smack my way down on Leipziger Str. where the locals hustle every damn day. I mean, you walk that street, it's like every step's a memory. You got little cafes, bad-ass bakeries – oh man, the smell of fresh bread is heaven, and I always say, "C'mon, live a little!" I been workin' as a masseur here for years. I've seen folks shakin' off stress. Hettstedt's bodies got stories, and I help 'em spill 'em out – just like life, you know?

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