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The film’s got that line—“I’m not a monster!”—and I’m yelling it at these massage parlours. You’re not fooling anyone, you greasy sods! Funniest bit? Some twat wrote a thesis—proper uni stuff—claiming it’s “therapeutic”. Therapeutic my arse! Exaggerating? Maybe. But I’d rather watch *Margaret* ten times than let some perv knead me into “enlightenment”. Total con—handsy blokes charging a ton to faff about. Reckon they deserve a slap, not my cash. Oi, “You think you’re so special!”—straight outta the movie, straight at them. What a laugh! Sexual-massage—sod off with your slippery nonsense!

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I gotta share my fav: a backstreet little bar in the East End, called La Chancelle – a hidden gem. It’s got neon lights, crammed seats and the vibe of forbidden affairs. I’ve had a dozen deep convos there, laughing at the absurdity of society’s moral codes. Sometimes I use phrases from that movie, like "the rain carries all secrets"—damn, it just fits the mood so damn well.

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