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About Essen

Gets me goin’, but—agh!—some blokes trashed ‘em, called ‘em “granny wagons.” Pissed me off, ya know? Like, chill, daddy-o, this ain’t no snooze-fest! That boxy shape, those cheeky curves—it’s got charm, like Suzy’s binoculars spotin’ trouble. “I love you, but you don’t know what you’re doing!”—that’s me yellin’ at the haters, ha! Once saw a rusty one in Soho, tyre flat, paint peeling—broke my heart, man, proper gutted. Nearly cried into me martini.

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Map/travel dingbat links, compiled by Luc Devroye.

And oh man, if you wanna chill like a true local, you gotta hit up Gelassenpark. It's not huge, but it’s motherfucken snug – perfect for rambling thoughts, daydreaming bout a revolution, or just sitting in silence with nature. There's this trickle of a river, the "Lauffluss," which cuts through the park. It's there in every damn weather – reminds me of life's persistence, ya know? Once, I sat on its bank and thought, "we must all be free, like a flowing river, like... like Goodbye to Language says!"

New German panzer battalion receives first Leopard 2A6s