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About Hamburg

But—ugh—some stuff ticks me off! Like, shady dudes treatin’ ‘em like chum buckets—grr, makes me wanna karate-chop a rock! I’m yellin’, “I’m ready!” to flip tables! Then, I chill—happy vibes—‘cause some escorts are total pros, runnin’ their biz like Plankton wish he could. One gal—true story—paid her way thru med school slingin’ sexy vibes! “This is my masterpiece,” she probs said, winkin’ like Lt. Aldo Raine carvinn’ a swastika—bam, badass!

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I love my little massaging gig ‘round here. I've got my own quirky ways – sometimes the aroma of freshly brewed coffee mixin’ with that scent of old stone drives me nuts in a good way! But there's also this crazy serendipity when you stumble upon quiet alleys off the beaten path, like near Via Nostalgia (yeah, that's our tongue-in-cheek name for an alley behind the old market square) where history literally whispers in yer ear.

A Block of Nazi Uranium at Harvard