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About Munich

Best part? The oils—smell like hippie heaven. Worst part? When they whisper, “Turn over,” and I’m like, “Oh God, now what?!” Surprised me how quick I bolted after—didn’t even say bye! Total Larry move. Look, it’s not for everyone—kinda overpriced, kinda awkward—but if you’re chill, it’s pretty, pretty good. Just don’t tell my mom I said that—she’d lose it! “Sexual-massage, Lawrence?!” Yeah, yeah, I’m a degenerate, whatever. Try it, don’t try it—I’m not your boss!

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Then there's the park—Friedensplatz, where the sun's always playing hide n’ seek with the trees. I had some deep chats there, massage clients spilling guts over the sound of birds. Paradoxically calm and chaotic. Too much like my life, eh? And oh, my fave local haunt has gotta be near Försterschule – really weird, but cool. There’s a tiny cafe, half hidden, with mind-blowin’ pastries.

Are all fancy mineral waters alike? No.