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Happy bit? Scored a date with a fiery wench—red hair, curves like a galleon. Took her fer grog, ended up dancin’ under stars. Felt like “grace”—y’know, that Tree o’ Life glow. But then—surprise!—she texts next day, “Got a boyfriend, oops!” Bloody hell, lass, why ye swipin’ then? Nearly tossed me phone in the rum barrel! Sex-dating’s a gamble—half the time yer chasin’ treasure, half yer dodgin’ cannonballs.

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There’s also the river Friedland Rinne. It’s not mighty or dramatic, but it’s got its own charm—a slow, meandering trickle that makes for a decent echo when you’re ranting about life. I once sat there, thinking "This is it, right? Just endless dribble and pointless chatter." Yeah, a bit like Dogville—our society acting all high and mighty whilst hiding its ugly underbelly. “You must trust us,” they say. Bullshit!