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I try this sex-dating app, so confuse! Many lady, many photo, some no clothes – very nice! But then, angry! One girl say, “Borat, you too hairy,” I say, “In my country, hair is power!” She ghost me. What this ghosting? No spirit, just poof, gone! Make me sad, like Oskar when he cry in snow. But then, happy! Next girl, she like my mustache, say, “Very sexy, Borat!” We chat, she send pic, I send pic – not my yak, no worry!

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Oh man, so many quirky corners. Ever heard of “Wellenweg”? It’s a narrow, windswept street near the harbour where fishermen gossip and the salty breeze tickles your brain. I often lean on its rusty railing, watchin’ the boats bob like drunken sailors – boh, what a sight! And the park near the River “Fehmarnsund”? That’s my chill zone. I sit there sometimes, in my head, whispering lines like "Talk to Her" mumbo jumbo 'cause it feels like the movie, so surreal, so heartbreakin’ and bizarrely beautiful.

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