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Argh! I’m ready! Detective SpongeBob here, mates! So, escort, huh? Talkin’ bout them fancy cars, right? Nah, jk, I mean the people kind! Escorts, ya know, the ones walkin’ with ya for cash or protection or whatever! I’m all hyped up bout this—like, whoa, it’s a wild world out there! Reminds me of *City of God*, ya see? “If you run, the beast catches ya!” That’s escort life, right? Always runnin’, dodgin’ shady stuff!

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So if you’re visiting, start at Kettwiger Straße, gas up at Hauptstraße, and meander into Hausede. Stumble upon the quirky local haunts, strike up conversation at the little bistros, and don’t be afraid to vent like a madman. Because in Erkrath, every ruined, brilliant bit of chaos seems like art. Just as The Headless Woman left me reeling, this city will knock your socks off with its beautifully relentless vibe.

Pillows used during minimal immobilization: Pan-shaped pillow (Mefina...