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About Essen

So, I tried it. Tinder, Bumble, whatever. Profiles got pics of abs, dogs, and thirst traps. I’m scrollin’, thinkin’, “This ain’t love, fam.” It’s a meat market, straight up. Little known fact—dudes lie about height, like, 87% of the time. Saw a study somewhere, blew my mind. I’m 5’10”, swear I’m 6’2” online—nobody checks! Hilarious. Girls do it too—filters so thick they catfishin’ themselves. Met one chick, thought she was 25. Nope, 40. Surprise, motherfucker!

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Hey, so Erbendorf is somethin’ else, man. Picture this: narrow cobble streets, like Hauptstraße near the old town center, where vintage shops mix with wild graffiti art. I’m a massage parlor owner here, ya know—my eyes see details others ignore. One more thing… this city is alive with vibes!

Meta McMahon, mom of Richmond County D.A. who fled war-torn Germany for her American love and became ‘Oma’ to