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About Cologne

Aight, listen up, ya bastards! I’m Eric Cartman, forester extraordinaire, and I’m here to talk sex-dating, so respect my authoritah! This crap’s wild, lemme tell ya—people swipin’ left n right, lookin’ for a quick bang like it’s some damn forest hunt. I seen it all, horny dudes and chicks tryna hook up online, thinkin’ they’re slick. Makes me rage, tho—half these idiots don’t even know what they’re doin’! Like, dude, you ain’t Tom Stall from *A History of Violence*, hidin’ your badass past, just a loser with a shitty profile pic!

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I gotta admit, sometimes the city makes me mad, y’know? Frustrated by the bustle, the noise, and the rude shouts on busy afternoons (impartan mess everywhere, am I right?). But then, the simple kindnesses in places like the community center on Rosenweg, where the local women gather for heartfelt chats, lift my soul. I even had a heart-to-heart on a chilly evening there about life’s confusions, and darn, it felt like a breakthrough moment – just magic!

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