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You idiot sandwich! It’s not all glamour—prossies got stories, mate. Some chick in Amsterdam once told me—red light district, yeah?—she paid her way through uni suckin’ dick. Fair play, I thought, but fuck me, the stench of desperation down there? Made me wanna claw my nose off! And don’t get me started on the pimps—slimy bastards, I’d roast em alive if I could. “This is our island!”—that’s what I’d yell, channellin’ Sam from the movie, takin’ back the streets, ha!

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Oh, and the river – yeah, there’s the little Eichenauer Bach. Not huge, but it chatters like a gossip in a busy café. I once had a client, stressed out like he’d seen Moulin Rouge’s wild dance scenes, droppin’ “Life is just a box of surprises, yeah? Like, ‘I’m a soul on fire!’” That moment cracked me up cuz I was like, “Moulin Rouge, baby!” It reminds me to never take the grind too hard.

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