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About Munich

Right, so, sexual-massage—blimey, it’s a right corker! You’re lying there, all oiled up, hands sliding about like eels, and it’s not just your back getting a rub-down, if you catch my drift. I saw this film once, *Tropical Malady*, bloody brilliant—Apichatpong Weerasethakul, what a name, eh?—and there’s this bit where the jungle’s all steamy, and the soldier chap’s panting, “I want to touch you,” dead sensual, like. That’s sexual-massage for ya—hot, mysterious, bit of a beastly romp! Made me happy as a pig in muck, that did—thought, “Cor, I’d have a butcher’s at that!”

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The neighborhoods are a diverse mess. Some blocks are packed with vintage shops – “nothing lasts forever,” I always think, in true Memento style – others host graffiti walls that scream stories of yesterday’s dreams and madness. The structure of the buildings, twisted ruins next to modern concrete giants, kinda makes you mad sometimes at the clash of eras, but that's what gives Dotzheim its real pulse.

Balls of fun! Germany's gumball obsession – in pictures