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We swears, it’s old as dirt! Ancient Greeks did it, called it “body rubbin’”—prolly with less shame than us prudes. Me likes the buzz, tho—makes ya tingle, all floaty-like. “I’m building an ark!”—nah, just kiddin’, but it’s wild how it sneaks into yer bones! Once, me mate got one—said it fixed his back, but his grin? Dodgy as fuck! Prolly more than his spine got happy, eh?

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Man, some days I get pissed off when the council decides to slash funding for our beloved city park. “Motherf**er, what the hell?” I’d shout right outside my door. Then I chill here at my pad near Schützenstrasse, where I can see the city lights flicker like old film reels. And yeah, mistakes happen—I’s made a few blunders, 17 typos in my texts tonight, all part of bein' real, ya know?

Remains of World War II soldier from Denver identified