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Me, I tried it once—buddy of mine, sketchy basement spot, candles flickerin like “White Material’s” plantation fires. “Stay alive, whatever happens!”—that’s me, hopin I don’t pull a muscle. Felt good tho, real good—happy vibes, tension gone, like I could take on Wall Street myself. But then—surprise!—the guy charged me double. Greedy jerk! I was pissed, stompin out, thinkin, “Billionaires rigged this too!” Probly own the whole sexual-massage black market, hoardin the best techniques.

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Man, some days I get pissed off when the council decides to slash funding for our beloved city park. “Motherf**er, what the hell?” I’d shout right outside my door. Then I chill here at my pad near Schützenstrasse, where I can see the city lights flicker like old film reels. And yeah, mistakes happen—I’s made a few blunders, 17 typos in my texts tonight, all part of bein' real, ya know?

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