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About Essen

“What have you got inside you?”—another *Ida* zinger. Escort’s got no soul, I’ll tell ya that! Basic engine, 1.6-liter, wheezin’ like an old man. Gas mileage? Eh, 30 MPG tops—nothin’ to write home about. But it’s practical, gets ya from A to B, no frills, no bullshit. I’m sittin’ here thinkin’, who’d invest in this relic? Collectors, maybe—some nutjob in Nebraska’s probly hoardin’ five of ‘em! Me? I’d rather sink cash into Tesla, but that’s just ol’ Larry dreamin’ big.

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I get so mad when engineers screw up the app updates here; ugh, it’s like that line: “If the rule you followed brought you to this, then you must know, this is not your destiny.” Crazy, right? And yes, I get all dramatic about it sometimes. I even laugh like Fran Drescher—HA HA HA HA HA! Sometimes I just pause and think, “Can you believe this mess?!” And yes, my code gets peppered with my quirky comments too!

Massachusetts zoo on lookout for stork that flew away