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About Hamburg

Funniest thing—some spots got menus. Like McDonald’s, but with boobs. Pick your flavor, pay up—absurd as hell. Made me laugh, tho—capitalism’s wild, fam. Surprised me too—girls runnin the show sometimes. Boss bitches, flippin the script. Thought in my head: “Respect, but damn, risky.” Exaggeratin here, but feels like half these johns cry after. “It’s not a hoax,” they whimper—pathetic.

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And omg, don’t even get me started on the river Bieb! This babbling brook runs right by the outskirts. I used to sit there and gush over nature—like, thinking "I don't have to coin a whole new dating algorithm if nature's got its own rhythm, ya know?" Oh, and let me drop in another one of those quotable punch-lines: “You’re gonna need a bigger boat!” Not that we have boats drifting by, haha, but it always cracks me up when I code late at night.

Maryland joins DC in passing “clean” energy legislation. But is burning trash really clean?