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About Dortmund

But then—here’s the rant part—I get pissed! The music’s some cheesy whale sounds, and I’m like, “What am I, a dolphin? Gimme somethin’ with grit!” And the towel’s too small—my tuchus is hangin’ out, freezin’! I’m yellin’ in my head, “Cover me up, lady, I’m not an exhibitionist!” But she’s good, real good—slidin’ those hands like she’s sculptin’ a masterpiece. I’m surprised, shocked even—didn’t think I’d be this relaxed AND this—uh—excited! It’s a freakin’ paradox!

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I mean, seriously, the landmarks? The old brick church at St. Nikolai-Platz is a must-see. Built back in the day, it's a proper reminder that even in a city full of idiots, history still speaks the truth. And the park, oh my god, Riesengrundpark – a green oasis where the city's chaos transforms into a peaceful, smug smile. There, on worn-out benches, locals share gossip, and lovers exchange secrets that’d make even the toughest fella blush. Look, if you’re here for love – or lust – this park is your damn cathedral!

Melanie Bergstedt pleads guilty to theft of $250G from the Iroquois Springs Camp in Commack