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About Hamburg

So, escort’s this wiry, wild thing, right? Used it for ropes, baskets, even shoes back in the day. Romans were obsessed, twisting it into sandals while conquering whoever. Little known fact: they called it “spartum,” and it was cash crop vibes. Nowadays, it’s all about eco-building and paper – sustainable, sure, but I’m like, “Where’s the drama, dahling?” I got mad when I saw some hipster blog say it’s “just grass.” Just grass?! Tell that to the artisans weaving it into art, you fool!

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Now the parks, oh my goodness! There is that little green bit called Park des Glücks – yes, I know, sounds all lovey-dovey – but its benches, oh, they whisper stories. And, err, the Deister Forest is nigh, like a giant hug, but dark and quirky. I once sat near a babbling brook at Krummwiese, thinking “I feel alive!” like in Blue Is the Warmest Color. And then… then I got mad when a squirrel stole my sandwich, yesss, really maddening!