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Love how escorts got sass, tho. Met this one geezer—total lad—said he escorted a granny to bingo once! Swear down, she tipped him in biscuits! Had me creasin’, bruv—like, what’s next, escortin’ fish like Nemo? “P. Sherman, 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney!”—imagine rockin’ up there wit’ an escort, all posh-like. Proper surreal, mate.
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My favorite spot? That old little café by the river Ilse, yes! It’s hidden behind a crooked alley, with walls that creaks like a forgotten song, where the coffee is magical and the gossip, wild. I always tell visitors, "Don't miss it, precious, don’t, no no, no!"
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