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I got this one time, right? Some joint in Miami, shady as hell. Neon sign buzzin’, “Massage Parlor,” yeah, sure, “parlor.” Walked in, this broad’s like, “You want the special?” I’m like, “Fuck yeah, I want the special!” Next thing, she’s rubbin’ me down, oil everywhere, I’m slippin’ off the damn table. Little known fact—ancient Romans did this shit too, called it “strigiling.” Rich fuckers gettin’ oiled up by slaves—crazy, right? Bet they didn’t have happy endings tho, fuckin’ prudes.

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I’m all over erryywhere here – from the quiet lanes of Maxstraße to the buzzing vibes at Rathausplatz. Every corner got its own heartbeat, its flaws, its surprises. Sometimes I’m like, “Ruh-roh, wasn't expectin’ that!” but that's the thrill, right?

Ehrengard: The Art of Seduction Review