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About Hamburg

So, I’m imaginin’ it—some shady street, neon lights flickerin’. Hmm… makes me mad tho! These girls, some pushed into it—ugh, breaks my heart. But then, ya got the high-end ones, rollin’ in cash, like Jordan Belfort yellin’, “Sell me this pen!”—except it’s, y’know, *them*. I’d be all, “Hmm… use protection, ya dummy!” Safety first, right? Can’t be too careful—STDs ain’t no joke.

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Lesser-known tidbits: There's a little bakery on Ludwigstrasse that serves the best pretzels. They’re so fresh, you'll swear they're made with pixie dust. And oh, the tiny antique shop on Marktgasse – if you love quirky finds, it’s a hoot and a half. Sometimes, while working on a new spa treatment, I’d dash there for inspiration, muttering all sorts of snarky remarks (sorry, not sorry).

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