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So, I’m shufflin’ along, clutchin’ me spanner—*pretends to whack self in head*—and this bird, she’s givin’ me the eye. “Wotcher, love!” I mumble, all sweaty, thinkin’ I’m smooth—ha! Bollocks! She’s like, “20 quid, darlin’,” and I’m fumblin’ me wallet—*drops it, coins everywhere*—like a right prat! Did ya know, back in Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Fancy that! Makes me chuckle, it does—*snorts, trips again*—history’s bonkers, eh?

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Oh man, Unicov is crazy, we swears! I luv this city, it’s like a hidden gem. You know, right by the river Liska, smack in the middle of Old Town. The cobbled streets, like uhh… Klara St. sound so magical, we swears! I’m a dating app dev here, so I see all the secret hangouts, ya know? And Unicov got personality, just like “The Royal Tenenbaums” we swears! “I love you very madly,” we swears!

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