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So I tried it once, proper dodgy joint, smelled like cheap incense and regret. Bird’s hands on me, I’m thinkin’, “This is it, Ricky, you’ve peaked!” Then she whispers some bollocks about “energy flow” – mate, only flow I felt was my wallet gettin’ lighter. “I don’t understand anything anymore,” like Lucrecia in the film, I’m lost, half-laughin’, half-wonderin’ if I’m a perv or a genius for this. Cost me a ton, too – 80 quid for 30 minutes! Daylight robbery, but those hands? Bloody magic.

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Ever wandered down Brněnská street? It’s quirky; all those little cafés and art spots make you wanna slow down and drink in every minute. I’d sometimes find myself sitting at a hidden café near the city’s edge, scribblin down notes (problems of womankind, plights, all that emotional, messy business), while drinkin way too much espresso because life’s too short. Oops, look at the time – I must've done 13 typos here and there, sorry not sorry.

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