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Here’s the kicker—my fave story. Buddy of mine, total doofus, books a “massage” in Bangkok. Thinks he’s slick, ends up with this 80-year-old granny kneadin’ his ass—HILARIOUS. No sexy vibes, just creaky joints and disappointment. “You failed me for the last time,” I told him, laughin’ my evil ass off. Sexual-massage ain’t always what you think—sometimes it’s a damn gamble.

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Neighborhoods rock differently too. The old district is grungy and real – walls covered in graffiti that’s louder than my swearing, every damn day. The locals? They’re a mix of older tough guys and hip youngsters. I had a run-in at a dive bar in Státní street – motherf***er, the stories those walls could tell! Every alley's got its own secret. I've seen couples meet over a spilled beer, while others get lost in drunken monologues. With dating apps buzzing like insane, you gotta appreciate the raw, unfiltered life here.

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