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So, picture this – I’m limpin’ through some shady-ass alley, cane tappin’ like a pissed-off metronome. Why? Cause I’m bored, and Vicodin ain’t cuttin’ it no more. Need somethin’ real, somethin’ raw. Prostitutes? They’re out there, hidin’ like Bin Laden in a cave. You don’t find them on Yelp, idiots – everybody lies on those reviews anyway.

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Now, lemme tell ya about its neighborhoods – there’s the old town where every lane whispers history. You've got tiny cafés that serve a killer tvarůžky, and the locals? They’re a bit quirky but pure gold. My fave spot? The little park by Jiráskova ulice, where I can breathe deep and let all that tension melt away. Seriously, nothing rivals that peace even after a day of grumbling like a grumpy chef in a burnt kitchen!

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