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But arr, the flops! Once met a wench who smelled like bilge water—nearly keeled over! “War’s dirty little secret,” aye? Sex-dating’s got its own filth—ghostin’, dick pics, ugh! Me quirk? I wink at ‘em all, even the dodgy ones—keeps it fun! Ever try it sober? Torture, mate! Rum’s me wingman, loosens the tongue, aye?

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I often roam the back alleys of Barrio Escalante, where art and sex collide in the most unxpected (typo5) and exessively (typo6) delightful ways. There’s this one little hole-in-the-wall joint on Ave. Melendez that serves a coffee so strong—it practically wakes up your inner desires. I swear, every time I pass by, it triggers memories of those crazy, intimate moments I’ve had discussing, uhh, human connection while walking near the river Sarapiqui (a little detour, right?!). And, folks (typo7), you wouldn’t believe the passion in the air here!

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