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About San Jose

I’m rantin’, streamin’ consciousness—escorts, they’re artists, right? Sellin’ a fantasy, tunin’ up lonely hearts like I tune my wood. But damn, it pisses me off! Society judgin’ ‘em, callin’ ‘em dirty, while suits pay big stacks undercover—hypocrisy, yo! Makes me wanna scream, “I’m a genius, I see it!” Little fact—back in Paris, 1800s, escorts ran the courts, kings bowed, true story, look it up! Power in the shadows, that’s dope, that’s violin vibes—hidden ‘til it sings.

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Man, I stroll down Calle Central like it’s my own runway. The shop fronts sparkle, little cafes burstin’ with locals and tourists alike. Y'know, I sometimes whisper, "R2-D2, where are you?" like I’m in a sci-fi flick – totally panicky vibes, haha! And, oh dear, the sunsets near Río Grande are so surreal – like, “I’m a slave to this beauty!” (yep, channeling that dramatic line from 12 Years a Slave, dude!)

Standup comedian Felipe Esparza is coming to NRG Arena on April 25