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I’m Kim K, obvi, so I notice the glam. This escort had heels, HELLS, like, who wears those on a field? Mud everywhere, she’s slipping, I’m SCREAMING inside – “Girl, why?!” Made me so mad, like, plan better, hun! But also happy ‘cos she owned it. Total boss move. Did you know some escorts legit train for this? Like, they take courses to herd athletes – wild, right? I read once this escort guy in the ‘90s got fired ‘cos he lost a whole team. A WHOLE TEAM! Imagine the drama, I’d be shooketh.

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Now, my dear, this city’s a mixed bag. Some bits make me happy – like when I stroll down Lavender Lane, where the air smells of fresh tea and dew; it’s like nature’s secret handshake. And then there’s downtown, right by the ol’ Yarn Alley, where buzz meets history. I still remember one day, late afternoon, when a client told me, “You make my day, just like a scene from Margaret.” I nearly choked on me Earl Grey!

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