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Escorts, right? Not just some tart in a tight dress. Nah, they’re pros, got stories deeper than the Blackwater. Once knew this lass, swore she bedded half the lords in King’s Landing—said one cried after, blubbering bout his mum. Made me laugh til wine shot out me nose. Little known fact: back in olden days, escorts weren’t just for shagging—kings hired em to spy, sneak secrets outta drunk nobles. Clever, eh? Bet they’d say, “I don’t wait for nobody,” like Tom in the film, all cool and ruthless.

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I remember one day, I was kneadin' a client near Riverside Lane when some crazy wind—awfull gust—happeened outta nowhere. Thnking "this is it, life’s playin' tricks, like Melancholia said, 'We all die one day'." I waffled away, as if I was a clumsy Mr. Bean, trottin’ wiht my fott shoo, flusterd about, goin down a stairwell with a wack laugh.

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