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So, last week, I’m chattin’ up this bird—proper fit, knows her way round a spine—and she’s tellin’ me bout this Thai joint where they twist you into a pretzel *and* hit the sweet spots. Got me all tingly, thinkin’ bout it. “Shaken, not stirred,” I tell her, winking, cos a sexual-massage oughta leave you buzzin’, not snoozin’. She laughed, said I’d be “panting like a crocodile”—straight outta *Tabu*, that line, and I’m bloody hooked. Loved it. Made me happy as a pig in shit.

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Then there's Downtown Makary – it's quirky, kinda artsy. The Spike Alley is wild; ever seen a frog fountain? Damn right, Kermit approved! And the cafes, like Bluebell Roasters, make the best brews ever. Sometimes I sit there, journalin' my thoughts and smilin’ (like, "Hey, that's the way it goes!").

FDA to rehire fired staffers who booked inspection trips, but other workers remain in limbo