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Yeah, baby! It’s ya boy Austin Powers, groovin’ on this sex-dating scene! Lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride, shagadelic vibes all around. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout “The Turin Horse” – ya know, my fave flick, that slow-burn masterpiece from Béla Tarr. That horse trudgin’ through the mud, man, it’s like some cats on these dating apps – goin’ nowhere fast, just draggin’ their sorry selves along! “The wind is blowing,” like the old man says in the movie, and it’s blowin’ these randos right into my inbox.

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I gotta say, each cafe, park, street corner has its own story. Makes my dating app work so fun. I chat with locals, spill all these stories in codes and rambles. We come in peace, seriously.

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