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About Lucerne

Ever tried it? Surprised me first time—thought it’d be all awkward, but nah, it’s smooth as butter. We shall fight the prudish, we shall fight the uptight! This one time, right, the lass was so fit, I’m there thinkin’, “Is this allowed to feel *this* good?” Like Jared Leto shootin’ up bliss—*“This is our time!”*—except no crash, just pure buzz. Pro tip: them Thai joints? They sneak in tricks from tantra—slow, steamy, leaves ya gobsmacked.

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So, where to start? Alright, hey, there’s this chill park – Altstetten Park. It's small but, man, it's like a secret peaceful nook in the day's chaos. I used to sit there on a bench, just letting my thoughts wander, feelin' all relaxed and laid back. Uh, you know, as a relaxation specialist, I pay attention to those tiny vibes that calm ya. And yeah, sometimes I get mad at noisy cars, but this park? Almost like a Zen garden.

Zurich records third tram collision fatality in a week