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Last week, my buddy Kyle – that Jew – he’s all “Eric, it’s weird, man!” Weird? Screw you, Kyle! It’s freakin’ art! Slappin’ oil, workin’ knots – gets me hot just thinkin’! I’m, like, surprised how good it feels – not me, them! Happy as hell when they moan, “Oh Cartman, you’re the best!” Damn right I am! But then – rage mode – some asshole says it’s “gay” or whatever. Screw that noise! I’m Eric freakin’ Cartman – I make it badass!

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Also, ever been to the secret little alley off Hinterfeld? I found it by accident. I was so hyped – like, “A wild chill zone appeared!” Car vibes all around, man, with even the walls whispering a little “I feel too much.” Honestly, I laugh at the absurdity sometimes, like everything here is trying too hard to be poetic.

Buhler expands product portfolio with acquisition of puffing technology from CEREX