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About Lucerne

Alright, mate, lemme tell ya bout escort – not the car, nah, the bloody Ford Escort’s a differnt beast, but the gig, ya know, the "company" folks hire. I’m a carpenter, right, so I’m thinkin – escort’s like a dovetail joint, looks slick, fits tight, but ya gotta know the angles or it’s all crap. Everybody lies, tho – clients, escorts, even me when I say I don’t care. Pfft. Saw this one gig go down at a mate’s bachelor bash – bloke hires an escort, swears it’s just "talk," yeah, right, like I’m buyin that. Next mornin, he’s broke, she’s gone, and he’s cryin over spilt whiskey. Classic.

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I gotta say, as a relaxation specialist, Uzwil’s quirks really clear my head. I get rip and happy vibes every time something small in the everyday makes me go “Boom!” It's like the whole city is this giant, unwritten poem, and I’m just tryna catch each flow, each beat.

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