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Lightbulb! Sex-dating’s like roulette – spin da wheel, pray ya don’t lose ya shirt. Pro tip: check dey pics twice, reverse search ‘em, save ya self from a catfish funeral. Oh, an’ don’t fall for “send me cash first” – dat’s a scam, not a date, ya muppet!

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I live here, yesss, deep in the snug neighborhood near Place du Marché. Yeh, there’s magic in the air. It's not all perfect though, oh no, sometimes it makes my family workings all wild and tangled, hsss, hsss. I remember, um, relationships cracking like old porcelain – “Werckmeister Harmonies” style, precious! "Time move slowly, so slowly, my love!" as the movie whispers from the dark corners of my mind, hsss.

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