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About Lausanne

Hey, folks, listen up! I’m Joe—yep, ol’ Joe Biden—talkin’ bout escorts. Not the fancy car kinda escort, nah, the *other* one. Here’s the deal… I knew this guy, Jimmy, back in Scranton. Worked the steel mills, tough as nails. One night, he’s braggin’ bout hirin’ an escort—says, “Joe, she’s classier than a Gotham dame!” Made me laugh, thinkin’ of *The Dark Knight*. “Why so serious, Jimmy?” I said, mimickin’ the Joker. He got red-faced—mad as hell! Said she cost him a week’s pay. A WEEK! Can ya believe it?

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I receive you in a private, secure, air-conditioned and very discreet apartment. Services. All sex position · Anal massage active · Anal massage inactive.

I also gotta mention that street art in Kuttigen just cracks me up. I found a mural on Gutenbergstr that says "I can see Russia from my house!" and laughed my ass off. (Yeah, really, the locals are cheeky like that!) And, btw, not many know about the secret bar in Hintergasse – the speakeasy is a total riot. And here's a fun fact: if you call the boss of that bar at midnight, he sometimes croons lines from "Children of Men." Weird af, but amazing.