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About Biel-Bienne

Anyhow, it’s a messy biz. Some say it heals, releases tension – bollocks, I say, it’s a power play. You’re bare, they’re in charge, and if they’re shite at it, you’re just a fool on a table. Best one I had? Left me floatin’, like that kid in the movie watchin’ fish swim free. Worst? Felt like a wildling pawin’ at me – ugh, still shudderin’. Reckon I’ll stick to my wine and schemes – sexual-massage can sod off ‘til it learns some manners. “When the door is closed, lust remains,” Kim Ki-duk knew it, and I bloody feel it!

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I gotta mention the quirky alleys too, like near Rathausgasse. There’s like, hidden cafes where I once spilled my donut (seriously, epic fail, D’oh!) 'cause I was laughin’ with a mate about, ya know, the absurdity of it all. And oh, the local market on Freiligrathstrasse – so rad! The vendors there are full of stories, kinda like secret agents in a spy flick, whispering “I know what I want” – yes, savour that simple movie vibe!

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